Photo taken from Rosie.doll's suite.

First of all, I'm so sorry for my constant absences in between posts. University + that emptiness I sometimes feel inside often attack and prevent me from writting (oh, also my laptop had problems and would constantly freeze when I had time and the will to write a post, but I think it's fixed now -- yay!) Sometimes I think I should write posts about my feelings. But that would be a hard thing to so since most of the time I DON'T KNOW WHY I FEEL LIKE THAT. Luckly I have very nice friends that help me forget about that unamed feeling and I get to have a great time.

ANYWAY, so today we're going to learn how to behave when having a group meal.

As mentioned on the previous post, posture is very important. So you'll want to make sure you're sitting properly: straight back, with the chair pulled to the front as much as possible so that you can sit confortably with your back against the chair, contrary to popular belief that say you can't touch the chair with your back. I don't know why people belive that, since a straight back will hurt after a few minutes because we're not used to it, and besides, chairs have backs for a reason. Your legs should not be crossed at the knee but rather at the ankles or just tuck one foot behind the other. Your elbows should NEVER sit on the table. Placing them on the table would only make the task of eating (properly, mind you) much more difficult and it's considered rude and impolite. Now that we're correctly seated, let's eat!

Oh, did I say eat? Oops, sorry. First, we still need to learn how to handle all the cutlery.

If you're having a meal at a fine restaurant or at a house owned by people who know the arts of etiquette, you'll most likely have various forks and knives and even glasses at your disposal on the table. They aren't decorative; they have a meaning.

First thing, when you sit, you can begin to unfold your napkin and place it on your lap. If you're a man and you're wearing a tie, it's considered polite to place the napkin on your collar to protect it.

Then, various meals should be served. Entrées (appetizers) come first. It can either be a soup (you'll immediately know that if you see a spoon at your right) or appetizers to eat by hand. These will require little to no use of the cultery. By the way, you use your cutlery from outside and work your way in. So for appetizers, you'll want to use your smallest fork which will be the one placed on the far left of your plate. A butter knife can be present at your right and you can use it to spread butter, jam or other marmelades available at your left side on a small plate with a single bread. For this, you'll also use the first plate, which is smaller than the main course dishes. If entrées aren't present, you're most likely eat a soup. Normally, soups are served before the actual meals so that you can have a balanced meal and not eat too much of everything, because it's considered rude to fill your plate on just one serving. Serve yourself in small portions, this way, if you happen to feel full, you'll not have left-overs on your plate which also comes off as rude because it will look like you didn't appreciate the food your host prepared for you.

Now, your first course will be presented to you and it will often be fish because it is light. Now things get complicated.

You'll have a knife that kind of looks like a spatula, which is the right one for fish, but if you don't own one, it's fine if you eat with a normal knife. Since you already ate your appetizers, your small plate and butter knife and fork are already gone, so you'll use the remaining knife. Hold the cutlery gently with your index fingers extended resting on the back of the cutlery and apply a gentle force to cut through the fish. Then there's your glasses. If you are of age and drink wine, white wine will be served in a small glass, because it is lighter and simply doesn't mess with the flavor of the fish in your mouth. It won't be filled all the way to the top because again, it's rude to fill it. You'll just have to do with the amount that was poured in your glass and eat in small bits and drink it in between. Also, always tap (not rub!) your lips with the napkin each time before you drink. You don't want to leave a greasy mark from your lips on your glass!

Then, in some situations, a palate cleanser will be served. It's usually a lemon ice cream or just lemon water. Its purpose is to clean your palate before beginning the next course. This way, you no longer have the food after-taste in your mouth and you'll be able to totally enjoy the next course as if it was just the first.

Now that you've finished your fish, your fish plate and white wine glass will probably be removed, and then comes the meat.

Now, you'll have a bigger knife and fork, those are for meat. The same happens when eating meat: hold your cutlery gently and use the index to apply pressure for cutting. NEVER, EVER raise your fork horizontally to hold the meat and cut with your hand in a fist. That's beyond rude and will make the table shake and annoy the other guests. I've had the unfortunate case of eathing with a person that does that and that was simply so annoying.

Red wine is, according to my grandfather, the best wine to serve with meat. So if you are of age and drink, you can expect it to be served in a larger glass. If you're not an alcohol drinker, water will always be poured in your smallest glass and you can let the server or your host know right before the fish is served that you don't drink alcohol and your bigger glasses will be removed from the table. Adicionally, you can drink water during all the courses.

Now, finished with the meat, you should place your cutlery together. Imagine the plate is a clock. The cutlery should be positioned at the 5 hours and 2 minutes. Now you will be served some dessert. You'll have in front of you, behind the plate, a small spoon and a small fork. Those are generally used depending on the person's preference. For example, I never eat fruit salad with a spoon simply because I find it more useful to use the fork. You can also use it for cakes if you prefer. For chocolate mousse, puddings or other fragile foods, you'll want to use the spoon, though.

Now to end this post, some thoughts to consider:

If you invite someone for a date, it's considered not only romantic but polite to pay for both of you. That isn't required if you are old friends with a more relaxed relationship and want to pay their own meal separately. 

Also, avoid using your phone. After all, you invited someone to be with them, not to spend time on your phone. That's probably one of the things I mostly hate but I've come to accept it, especially because I rarely have formal dinners and when I'm among very close friends I like a relaxed environment. It's also not good to make your friends feel that they can't have their phone moments as if you're pressuring them to give you 100% attention. You'll sound demanding and people won't really want to be with you again. Or you can get around by politely saying you want to be with them and using their phone offends you.

Eat in small bites, don't fill the fork too much, and chew at least 5-10 times so your food goes all the way down gently. (You could choke on the food and make a scene!) And in any circunstance, never speak with your mouth full. You could accidentaly spit the food to the table, their plate or worse, your fellow diners. That's disgusting! 

If you happen to have eaten a fishbone or something that has a bad taste for your palate, get your fork and cover your mouth with the other hand while you expell the undesired substance onto your plate and place it on the far corners of the plate. The same for when you have remains of food on your teeth. Cover your mouth with the hand and use a toothpick.